Blue

So this morning I went for my Sunday run.  This being the long run that I am starting to do once a week (the term ‘long’ of course being completely relative to what I do normally) to train for the 10k in July.  Anyway, off I went in the rain and the cold, jogging along until I could jog no more.  Teeny tiny problem with where I go is that I have no idea how far it is which is actually a giant problem for me mentally.  So in a fit of frustration I decided that I am changing the driving factor in my exercise routine.  I am definitely going to do the 10k in July and I am still going to run every day (except my rest days, relax!) and I’m still going to do the Sunday long run and increase it incrementally as the weeks go by.  But my motivation has changed.  I’m now going to run until I reach the point where I am no longer comfortable and then I’m going to push past that a little and then stop.  Maybe it will take longer this way and maybe that’s not how athletes do it.  But I am not an athlete.  I’m a former overweight smoker who happens to have lost 70 pounds and quit smoking.  Nowhere in that description is there any requirement that all of a sudden I have the ability to do crazy amounts of exercise.  Plus, not knowing exactly how far I’ve gone is really frustrating for me.  I’ve done everything else by tracking and watching numbers and this fuzzy distance-measuring nonsense is driving me nuts!  It doesn’t work with the previous motivation to run 10k in July without stopping however it does work with the theory that I’ve just described so that’s where I’m going to stay for now.  Continuous improvement is nothing to sneeze at even if I can’t tell the exact distance that I’m able to go.

While I was running around Mud Bay this morning I was suffering a little mentally. This whole website address thing has me pretty upset.  Not so much who might be reading it because I’ve never said anything on here that wasn’t honest.  When you maintain that level of honesty you really have nothing to worry about aside from people who might not normally have known stuff will now know the personal stuff.  What bugs me more is that I now feel like I have a filter on.  I feel like now I won’t be able to write quite like I did before, with nothing held back.  I guess I’ll have to wait and see how it turns out.  This little corner of the internet that I’ve made my own has been such a huge factor in what’s gone on in the last 7 months and it makes me so sad to think that I might have ruined that.

So Happy Chocolate Bunny Day (Sugar Free Chocolate Bunny Day at my house).  I’m going to spend the rest of it lazing about drinking copious amounts of coffee spiked with SF Caramel syrup to make myself feel better.

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6 Comments

  1. lillian64 said,

    March 23, 2008 at 2:37 pm

    I did my run/walk today. It’s only the first day of my second week, but I felt as I was running that I didn’t need the walking part. I did it anyway since I didn’t want to overdo.

  2. JanB said,

    March 23, 2008 at 2:45 pm

    I would like to say for the record that I don’t know you other than through this blog, but I love to visit your site and read about your wonderful success! Take care, I worry a lot about writing too much too. I think it’s universal among women bloggers. I would LOVE to come out of the closet to my family, but so far only my daughter Kim and husband read me – I mean, that I know of.

  3. p4p said,

    March 23, 2008 at 5:01 pm

    Shanny: sounds like you will still be challenging yourself with the way you describe your outlook on running, which is totally what athletes do. Seems to me like you are a former overweight smoker who happens to have lost 70 pounds and quit smoking who is turning into quite the athlete.

  4. Lady Shanny said,

    March 23, 2008 at 5:18 pm

    Good Job Lillian! You’re right about not overdoing it! Try to keep a bit of a training schedule…as in make a plan for walk/running that will increase your running time a bit slower than you think you can do. I’ve found that works better than increasing as you THINK you can because it’s less pressure on you…this way you are run/walking and can get mentally prepared to increase that. I’m certainly no expert, that’s just what has worked for me.

    JanB, I’m glad to know you, even if it is only through the internet! I’m not quite sure what I’m going to do about writing what my heart says anymore. We’ll see.

    p4p, I think I still will be challenged, just less pressured. I don’t know about calling myself an athlete but certainly when I compare Current Me with Old Me I might as well be running a marathon every day. Everything is relative, right?

  5. p4p said,

    March 24, 2008 at 8:57 am

    Only if you are a pomofo.

  6. madmargaret said,

    March 24, 2008 at 2:45 pm

    Hey Shanny — congratulations on cleaning, congratulations on not smoking, and congratulations on your running goals! I don’t know you outside this blog either, and I know I’d be horrified if people I knew were privy to my inner thoughts on my site too, but stay strong and stay true to yourself.


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